I'm leaving on a jet plane...

Steak and chips, por favor...

Thursday August 30th: Diet Blair looks to be well and truly back in action. Well, he's talking now. And that's got to be a good thing. Doesn't it? The Guardian says that he's making a stand on immigration. No sir, he doesn't like it and there has been all together too much of it since Labour came to power a decade ago.

Where to begin....

As a child of immigrants, I definitely feel a way about this. I'm not going to get into it, because I could literally be here all night. The monetary debt Africa owes to Western governments will only take a couple of hundred generations to pay off and believe it or not, a thousand concerts like Live 8 featuring the likes of Pete Doherty, completely off his face on whatever he's taking this week, do nothing for them (Snoop smacked it though - I take my hat off to anyone who uses the word 'Motherfucker' on the BBC at tea-time on a Saturday. Legend.)

I will, however, say that - if you drop a bomb on someone's house in order to "save" them, I wouldn't be too surprised when they turn up on your doorstep looking for a place to kip.

Should Spain close it's doors to the ex-pats who emigrate to the Costa del Sol? There would be more sun loungers for everyone else by the pool and fewer sunburnt skinheads, refusing to eat the native cuisine and demanding 'Dos beee-eeeers, mate'. All while calling the male locals 'Pedro'...

Dave is finding his stride. He believes in himself again (maybe he has a 'lifestyle guru' of his own?). When asked about the negative vibes that the Old Boys Club have been firing in his general direction all he said was "I am a Conservative." We would never have guessed, DB. We would never have guessed.

Also in the news is yesterday's 12 hour prison strike, over pay. It started at 7 in the morning and lasted until just after 7pm. I also read that The News Of The World's favourite paedo/murderer, Ian Huntley had to be personally guarded by the governor of his prison, so that none of his fellow prisoners might get the idea of increasing the iron in his diet, by way of a shank in the stomach. For some reason the whole thing reminds me of the closing scenes of Natural Born Killers, with Jack Straw in Tommy Lee Jones' role...

Comic relief in what was a exceptionally serious affair, came from inmates in a Cardiff prison who chanted "You're breaking the law" at union members.

Mr. Nelson is back at work tomorrow. Chaka Khan's scheduled support slot is less than a week away now. I can't wait. Watch out for me busting Turbo from Breakdance's move with the broom during Ain't Nobody. Consider yourselves....WARNED.